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(来源:英语博客 http://space.englishcn.com)

There’s the lady you find in the break room, always on a diet and commenting on your weight (God help you if you are proportionate, she will eat you alive). The guy who shows off way too many baby pictures of his not-that-cute-kid. The girl who stays in her office with the door shut, even during fire drills. And the dreaded over-talker who never gets the hint (which might explain why that one girl stays in her office)。 休息室那个女人,永远都在节食而且喜欢对你的体重评头论足(假如你不幸身材匀称,那就准备好做她那张利嘴之下的牺牲品吧);初为人父的那个男同事,总是没完没了地炫耀他那不怎么可爱的孩子的照片;永远紧闭办公室大门的那个女孩子,就连消防演习也不出来;还有那个可怕的话痨,从来不知道何时该知趣地闭嘴 (这也许是那女孩子呆在办公室不出来的原因)。 We all play roles in our workplaces, many of which are unique to only our office. But there’s a standard cast of characters as well. You can find varieties of them anywhere you go, but they all share the same skill sets. They are the ones who will succeed and the ones who will fail。 我们在职场上都扮演着各自的角色,有些则是我们的办公室里独有的,但也有标准的角色类型。你到哪都能找到这类人,他们都有着相同的技能,他们分别是会成功的和会失败的类型。 In lieu of filling you with fluffy “this is what a successful person looks like” talk, I thought I’d take the opposite route. The following is a list of people who stand out for all the wrong reasons. Fair warning: If you don’t know who this person is at your office, it might be you。 与其轻浮地教导你“成功者是什么样的”,我宁愿反其道而行之。下面列出由于各种错误的原因而脱颖而出的人们。预先奉告:如果你不知道办公室里的这种人是谁,那可能就是你。 The Gullible One。 轻信者 If I’ve learned anything over the years, it’s that you should never believe everything a company says. Don’t believe them when they say they don’t expect layoffs (the mere mention of that word suggests they’re on the way). Don’t believe that they’ve offered you the highest salary they can. Don’t believe them when they say they can’t negotiate your raise. And definitely don’t believe them when they say “this year has been really bad, but next year you’re going to get hooked up on that promotion you want!” 如果说多年来我学到了什么,那就是你绝不能相信公司说的所有话。不要相信他们说不会裁员(这个词会被提起,就说明这已经在他们的计划之中了);不要相信他们向你提供的是最高限度的薪水;不要相信他们说不能协商加薪;更绝对不能相信“今年形势相当不好,但明年你就能得到想要的升职”这样的鬼话。 When a boss, HR rep or recruiter (or anyone playing a role in your career and financial success) states something that makes you tilt your head to the side and think “huh…that seems sketch,” don’t just accept it。 当老板、人力资源代表或招聘人员(或任何在你的职业生涯和财富成功上扮演此角色的人)说的话让你歪头思考“嗯……这似乎不靠谱”,千万不要接受。 As I’ve said before, the car dealer will act like he can’t budge on a number. But if you stand up and start walking to the door he’ll automatically find a discount for you. Companies are in it for the bottom line even when they’re negotiating things with their employees. They want to encourage you to stick around while also finding a way to save money. And it saves them money to give you a smaller raise, to skip a round of promotions, to make you work through Christmas. Don’t fall for it。 正如我之前讲的,汽车经销商会表现得不能对数字让步。但当你起身走人,他立马就会主动给你打折。公司处处以自身利益作为首要考虑,甚至在与其员工谈判时也不例外。他们想要鼓励你留下,同时也在寻求省钱的方法。给你低一点的加薪,跳过一轮升职,或者让你坚持到圣诞节后,都可以帮他们省钱。不要信以为真。 The Groupthinker。 集体主义者 Groupthink is a psychological problem that runs rampant in workplaces. Even more if you’ve got a large population of “longtermers” in a corporation. Groupthink is why technology isn’t updated, why policies are outdated, why there’s no new blood (or ideas) on a team, why you hear the sentence “you can’t do that, that’s not how we’ve always done it!” 集体主义是在职场中猖獗的心理问题,尤其是当一个公司里有大批“长期雇员”时更是严重。集体主义导致技术不能更新,政策过时,团队没有新鲜血液(或想法),以及听到类似于“你不能那么做,这不是我们一贯的做法”这样的话。 It’s easy to spot these people, especially if you’re new to a company. They sit in clumps together and they make bizarre statements in meetings, they do the same things every day and they complain when their life is disrupted by something (or someone) new。 发现这些人很容易,尤其是在你刚进入公司时。他们坐成一团,在会议中进行奇怪的发言,他们每天做同样的事,他们抱怨新事(或新人)扰乱了他们的生活。 If you fight against a mass of groupthinkers, you run a high risk of failure, persecution, derailment and tons of frustration. But if you engage and join them, you will become stupid and possibly unmarketable for your next career jump. Take your pick。 如果你跟一群集体主义者对着干,就面临着失败、被迫害、被排挤的高风险和无数的挫折。但如果你参与和加入他们,你将变得愚蠢,在下次跳槽时可能没有市场。自己选吧。 The Fearful One。 胆小怕事者 People do ridiculous things when they’re scared. Just ask anyone who’s died in a horror movie (I mean, who drops the phone and runs up the stairs?!)。 人们在害怕时会做出可笑的事情。你可以去问下恐怖电影里挂掉的人(我想说的是,这些人是有多蠢才会在遇到危险时丢下手机往楼上跑呢)。 Fearful people will cause you serious amounts of trouble at work. If they’re scared of getting fired, they will find a way to point a finger at you. If their project is failing, they will suggest your role was to blame. Drowning people will grab whatever they can to keep their head above water. Don’t stand too close and become that object。 胆小的人将给你的工作带来相当多的麻烦。如果他们害怕被解雇,他们会找到方法把麻烦转嫁给你。如果他们的项目失败,他们会找你来背黑锅。溺水的人会抓住任何他们可以抓住的东西以将头部保持在水面上。别靠得太近否则你就会成为牺牲品。 And don’t become the drowning person. If you ever feel worried about something at work, you sense something bad coming your way or you screw up big time, avoid the fear by taking some action. Talk to someone, your boss, your mentor or a peer to get information that will quell your fears. Or fess up and find out immediately what repercussions are headed your way for the screw-up so you’re not worried about the unknowns. Do whatever you need to do in order to avoid becoming the fearful one。 也别成为溺水者。如果你曾经为工作上的事感到担心,你会觉得坏事即将到来,或者浪费大把时间采取行动来逃避这种恐惧。与他人、老板、导师或同龄人聊天,以获取信息来平息恐惧。或者坦白并立即寻找搞砸会有什么后果,这样就不用为未知担心。做必要的事以避免成为胆小怕事者。 Apathetic Guy。 麻木不仁者 The other day, a friend of mine posted a message on Facebook FB +0.12% stating her frustration that people keep calling her upcoming maternity leave a “vacation。” She mentioned a litany of things that have to be done while you’re on maternity leave (none of it sounded remotely vacation’ish). She referenced this because she felt judged and persecuted for her decision to take the time off。 某一天,我的一个朋友在Facebook发布了一条信息,说不断有人把她即将到来的产假称作“度假”,她感到很沮丧。她提到了在产假里需要做的一连串事情(做这些事丝毫不像是在度假)。她引用这些是因为她觉得她的休假决定遭到了非议。 Consider now the single person. If you haven’t been in this demo for awhile, you might not be aware of this, but single people are also victims of workplace apathy. I’ve actually heard the sentence, “You can stay late tonight to finish this, right? I gotta get out of here and it’s not like you’re going home to a family。” 再想想单身的人。如果你脱离单身有一段时间了,你可能意识不到这一点,但单身的人也是职场冷漠的受害者。实际上,我听过这样的话,“今晚你可以留下来完成这个,对吧?我得走了,反正你好像没有家人在等你回去。” Everyone is dealing with something. Everyone feels judged and misunderstood every once in awhile. And everyone feels the sting from these moments. Show some compassion even when you’re having trouble putting yourself in their shoes。 每个人都有需要处理的事情。每个人都会觉得曾经被人妄下结论和误解。每个人在这种时刻都感觉到痛苦。就算你无法站在他们的立场思考,至少也要表现出点同情心吧。 Don’t be the apathetic coworker. The grass isn’t always greener, even though it may appear so。 不要做麻木不仁的同事。篱笆另一边的草未必更绿,哪怕它们看起来如此。 The Sore Loser。 输不起的人 Anytime you’re successful or experience something great in life or your career, I guarantee you that someone somewhere will doubt that you earned it the good ‘ol hard-working way. That someone somewhere is the sore loser。 无论是你成功或是在生命或职业中经历好事时,我保证总有人在那怀疑你是不劳而获的。这种人就是输不起的人。 A sore loser will think you got that deal because you’ve got an important last name. Or that you were hired because your Mom sits in the corner office. Or that you simply got lucky (literally and figuratively)。 输不起的人总觉得你能拿下那笔生意是靠背景。或者你能被雇佣就是因为你母亲是高管,亦或只是你走运了。 You can’t stop a sore loser from thinking what they want and you can’t convince them out of their opinion. The only way to battle a sore loser is to make sure they’re not right (it might surprise some of you ladies that yes, business can indeed be conducted outside the bedroom!)。 你无法让一个输不起的人停下来想下他们要什么,也无法驳倒他们的观点。唯一与之斗争的方法就是证明他们是错的(是的,这些懦夫们也许不知道,生意确实是可以在卧室外进行的)! Use your connections and your network to get ahead, but do your own dang work. Show results. Then the sore losers will disappear one by one。 使用你的关系和人脉去取得进展,但做好自己的本职工作。拿出成果。然后那些输不起的人会一个个消失。 Malicious Gossiper。 恶意的闲话者 There’s harmless gossip and then there’s malicious gossip. Harmless gossip is…harmless. But you must avoid the malicious gossiper completely. In fact, put large amounts of space between you and this person。 有无恶意的闲话,就有恶意的闲话。无恶意的闲话就是……无害的。但你必须完全避开那些恶意的闲话者。事实上,对这种人应退避三舍。 Assume that since they’re willing to share really bad information with you, they’re sharing it with other people. They’re kind of like the flu。 如果他们愿意与你分享特别坏的消息,那一般情况下他们也会与将其与他人分享。他们就像流感一样。 If you run across a malicious gossiper and they start talking, whatever you do, don’t agree with them. Because the next thing you know, your sentence of “Oh, I agree with you – I bet she totally slept with that guy to get that job” will be shortened to “So and so just told me that so and so slept with so and so!” And voila, you’re screwed。 如果你遇见个恶意的闲话者,他们开始交谈,不管做什么,你都别赞成。因为不久你就会发现,你的那句“噢,我赞成你——我打赌她肯定跟那谁上床了才得到这份工作”会被精简为“那谁刚告诉我,谁跟谁睡觉了!”恭喜,你倒霉了。 The Apologizer。 妄自菲薄者 I recently attended an event where several startups were invited to pitch. One woman stood up to sell her idea to a room undoubtedly full of millions, a big opportunity for a small company. She looked sharp and ready. But then she opened with, “Don’t worry, this isn’t a crappy website that does blah…" 最近我出席了个活动,许多创业者被邀请来演讲。在无疑满是百万富翁的房间里,一位女士站起来推销她的想法,这对于一个小公司是一个大机会。她看起来精明而沉稳,然而她的开场白是:“别担心,这不是那种蹩脚网站……” Well shoot. For the remainder of her presentation, I assumed her website was crappy。 说得好。在她之后的演讲中我基本上就假设那是个蹩脚的网站了。 The Apologizer will discredit themselves as soon as they open their mouth. They will start a presentation with qualifying statements like the one above or they will ask for a raise by saying, “I know we don’t have a lot of money, but…” They lose these deals because they show a massive lack of confidence in the statement, regardless of topic。 妄自菲薄者在开口时会先贬低自己。他们会像上面那样以资格声明作为演讲的开始,或许他们在要求加薪时会说:“我知道我们钱不多,但是……”他们的失败是因为他们在陈述中大量缺乏信心,不管话题是什么。 You don’t necessarily have to avoid this person. Just don’t be this person. The company pays you a salary because they think you’re worth it. You have every right to be in the room and to be having that conversation right then. Why act like you don’t belong there? 你不一定要躲开这种人,但不要成为这种人。公司付工资给你,是因为他们认为你值这个价钱。你有充分的权利呆在这房间里进行正确的谈话。为什么要表现得你好像不属于这里? Repeat the following statement as many times as you need to before you have an important conversation or make a presentation: Be confident, not cocky。 在你进行重要谈话或演讲时,根据你的需要尽可能多地重复下面的话:自信而不自大。 Then own the heck out of it. Your career depends on it。 然后坚持到底迎接结果。你的职业生涯取决于此。

 
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